Horizontal Lives

True Tales of the Infamous Courtesan: Persephone N. Hades and her Horizontal Life underground. How she got there, her mis-adventures and her struggle to re-surface.

Friday, March 11, 2005

All's I got to say is, Folks do Strange Things when they live in New York City.

a Quick Blip before bed:

To PITA:
Thank you. Not only are you probably the first to actually get through my "War and Peace" length blog, but your reaction was so lovely. Thank you for listening with your heart.

On to the day:

I am walking down my street, a quiet side tree-lined street off the main avenues of Manhattan; a street lined with cars parked bumper to bumper, heading to the major crossroads to catch a cab.

My eyes follow my feet.
For two reasons.
One, because I don't want to slip on the snow turned ice.
And two, because I am wearing my glasses and don't want to meet anyone's eye feeling so ugly and dorky.

I hear a sound incongruent to New York City noises.
A Bell.
A tinkling bell.

I ignore it because I'm pretty sure I couldn't be hearing a tinkling bell.
I keep walking. Think back on my day of penises.
There it is again.
I look up and over to the parked cars I am passing on the sidewalk to where the sound seems to eminate from.

There is an unprecidented space the size of a Volkswagon between the cars.
Walking on the street, passing beteen that space, I spot the source of the tinkling bell.
There, in the middle of the road, is two men, chatting in high-pitched voices folowed by a leash.
I slow down to the exact way in which the leash seems to be attached to the bell.

Following the men, on the end of the leash, finally passing by the empty space is,
No.
It couldn't be.
What am I saying?
Of course it could be.
How long have I lived in this City?
Of course it could be.
And it is.
Oh-My-God.
On the end of the leash, lead by these good-looking, cheerful men, is a goat.

A goat wearing a bell.
Umm--hmm.

The words of turn-of-the-century actress Mrs. Patrick Campbell immediately come to mind:

"It doesn't matter what you do in the bedroom, as long as you don't do it in the streets and frighten the horses."

Yep.

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